Pepperage Farm puff pastry
One bag frozen spinach
One bag frozen Broccoli
Shitloads of garlic (at least 5 or 6 cloves)
Generous handfuls of pine/pignoli nuts
Lots of good olive oil S&P
Take one sheet of pre-fab pastry dough out of the freezer to soften for at least 25 minutes. Preheat oven to 375 degrees Throw bag of spinach in a bowl and microwave the hell out of it, five minutes or so. Drain, drain, drain, by actively pressing with a fork through a strainer. When it's pretty dry, set aside. In a fry pan, heat up at least 1/4 cup of olive oil on low to medium heat, the better quality and the more you use the better. To this, crush as much garlic as you and your guests can tolerate (be careful not to burn the garlic!) and the nuts and let this marry for a few minutes, till garlic is browned but certainly not burned. After garlic is brown, add about half a bag of the Broccoli, digging thru to the bottom searching for the florets rather than the stems. Stir it all up, let the garlic cook but not overcook. Then, add your dried spinach paste and mix that in well to absorb all the tasty flavors. Add heaps of salt and pepper. When all veggies are coated, turn off the heat and let it rest. When this mixture is cool enough to work with, puree it in the food processor to make sort of a pesto out of it. This may require some patience, as the Broccoli can be resilient while the spinach may want to become baby food. A couple of batches may be necessary. When you're all mushed up, adjust the seasoning for salt, pepper and olive oil. Set this mixture aside.
Flour a giant ass countertop and get ready to work the dough. You will need a rolling pin or a long, label-less wine bottle. Carefully unfold the dough and flour its surface and the business end of your rolling pin or wine bottle. Roll out the dough. Roll it out. Let your mind wander. Breath deeply. Let it get as big as it wants to without tearing or losing its square shape. Then, cut it into three equal parts. Go back to your veggie pesto thing you made before. One by one, you'll want to spread the mixture onto the dough, leaving some vacant space on both ends. Roll them all up and seal the ends with a bit of raw egg. Slice up your little jelly roll-looking objects like a sushi roll and put them on a baking sheet. Brush the tops of these little bits with just a touch of raw egg. Bake them forever, at least 25-30 minutes, but check after 25. You'll want them golden brown. Eat warm. Easy, foolproof, but a pain in the ass! Enjoy! Serve at your cousin's bar mitsvah....